laffinkid's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- it's something in the water "everbody wants to rule the world" i hate everything about my last entry except for the part about the fish. i needed to dry out a little bit i think. and now i could just swim in that cool glass of water i've been wanting and you've been drinking from. i saw brian from italian yesterday. he works at barnes&noble, but i had until yesterday never seen him there. he looked appetizing as ever. and i know he recognized me, beneath my shaggy dirty bangs and dingry gray tank top. behind my sunglasses: indoors. but i ran the other way. i never thought i'd see him again. the first thing i thought of was the letter. the second: i smell wierd and am with immature people, i can't talk to him right now. i just can't. the third was: italian stallion. and mercedes knew in all her wiseness my infatuation for this man. despite my efforts to hide, she saw it in the peach pink of my face. blush when he brushed past. and now i can't think of anything but when i see him again. and chris called me yesterday. are these males tests, or warnings? options. but then it would just be oh here's this letter i wrote to you 8 months ago, but i'm still under 18 so i cannot act on this passionate confession. sorry. goodbye. and that is simply illogical. and this nervousness with the "coffee" between my dad and noah makes me sick to even ponder briefly. i'm a commit-o-phobe. unless it's to undersea creatures who are willing and able to hide in the reef with me. and he is no undersea creature. a lion who would, in an ecstatic pounce of joy, not hesitate to play with the red little scorpion between his paws. until he realizes he's killed her. and she looks more dry than usual. it doesn't have to be that way. lately i just feel ashy. 11:55 a.m. - 2004-06-20 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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